What Causes Anger?
The question of why some shrug off annoyances and warranted frustrations and others can’t is not clear-cut. Anger is a fundamental human emotion tied to survival and is part of our nervous system’s “fight, flight, or freeze” response. Often these feelings arise when we are having difficulty with control which means increased anger and irritability. Anger also often occurs along with depression, sadness and grief. Additionally, exposure to past trauma and stressors build upon each other to change how we react to current life events.
How Can I Manage My Anger?
For those who struggle with occasional outbursts or chronic anger, learning how to identify and navigate this powerful emotion is crucial. Contrary to popular belief, unleashing anger tends to make anger worse rather than providing relief. Be aware of your feelings to prevent anger from becoming routine and spiraling into aggressive behavior towards yourself or others.
General Health:
- Be active. Walking, jogging, weightlifting and yoga will help. Don’t forget about stretching, muscle relaxation, and even deep tissue massage.
- Get enough rest. Sleep deprivation makes it harder to control angry impulses.
- Spend time outside. Sun, fresh air, and gardening can do wonders for the body.
- Eat well and avoid drugs and alcohol.
Self-Reflection:
- Slow down. Consider alternative interpretations of situations that upset you.
- Avoid using inflammatory words. Words can fuel anger and make you feel more agitated than you really are. Don’t say these words to yourself, or others.
- Pause and revisit. Take time to cool down and reflect on the patterns that trigger your anger.
- Be kind to yourself. Know that it’s ok to get mad and feel angry. If you have been wronged or treated unfairly, anger is an appropriate response, but expressing it aggressively is not.
Resources:
- Calming techniques. Deep breathing and adopting a problem-solving mindset can help you stop, revisit, and learn to navigate anger.
- Maintain a connection to community. Volunteer and engage in acts of service for friends or family. Seeing the good in others and in yourself can help you reframe day-to-day difficulties.
- Try a support group. Groups can help you feel heard and also help reframe unhealthy thoughts.
- Consider professional counseling and therapy. Overcoming anger often requires acknowledging your most vulnerable feelings which can be difficult to face alone.
What are some signs that should I seek professional support?
- You feel out of control.
- You do things out of anger that you regret.
- You have hurt yourself or other people emotionally or physically.
- Your friends and / or family members have said that they think you have a problem with anger.
- People spend less time with you because of things that happened when you were angry.
Contact your EAP
If you think that you or a household family member might have a problem with anger, contact your Employee Assistance Program (EAP) for CONFIDENTIAL counseling, referrals or information.